Wow, so Josiah finally went down for a nap after about a 15 minute temper tantrum that escalated when I tried to remove him from the offending toy. He became uncontrollable. I hate days like this, he has done this a few other times, it really scares me, what happens when he is older? I do not think this is a discipline problem, its clearly something going on in his body. Yesterday we went to Chipotle for my Birthday, I avoided the suspected wheat, but there definitely could have been some cross-contamination and we both had corn. He was hyperactive the rest of the evening and didn't fall asleep until 10 pm despite only having two 10 minute naps (car rides). This is so hard for me, we still bed share and nurses whenever he wants at night, and I am pretty much the sole caretaker 24/7. Ryan helps out some but he is only around a few hours a day during the week and is very tired after work. I am fine with having to take care of the parenting and housework, its just days like this that really challenge me. I can't stand it when he whines and pushes me around and is crazy. We had a bit of a break from that for a couple weeks while being wheat-free. I just can't seem to keep our diet right.
I am also constantly concerned about his growth. Today I weighed him and while our scale is pretty iffy at times he was the same he was last month!(which was the same the month before that and the month before that.. and so on!) I am so confused. I hate comparing him to other kids his age but its hard not to when he is so far behind in not just growth but communication and verbal skills. I don't care if he has a high IQ, I don't care if he goes to Harvard or not, but I do know a child needs to be learning continually how to say words and communicate what they want and how they feel. He is always learning new words thankfully, but is still having trouble putting words together, and being able to express himself. He went through a phase last year where he would ask "whats that?" he hasn't said phrases like that in a LONG time, although he has learned some of the common ones like "all done". So I am definitely going to be working on getting him to talk especially since he still uses jargon speech a lot. That might really help him to verbalize how he feels, its hard to know when a food is making him feel bad if all i can go by is his behavior which like today could be a delayed reaction or could be the strawberries, grapefuit? I just don't know anymore.